Nurture Your Own Heart

I've been thinking about things
And I've come to realize
You're no good for me to be around
You're nothing but poison

You're vial and viscious
You're low like a snake
I'm done with you forever
So, be gone already

No more emails or texting
No more having any parts
Of me. I'm no longer the
one who supports you.
It's all up to you now
Nurture your own heart

I've sat around rewinding what happened
All I come up with is that
somewhere, something was lacking
but no more, it's good

The first days were hard
But by the third, I was fine
Talking about things, I realized
Was really a waste of time

No more emails or texting
No more having any parts
Of me. I'm no longer the
one who supports you.
It's all up to you now
Nurture your own heart

No more emails or texting
No more having any parts
Of me. I'm no longer the
one who supports you.
It's all up to you now
Nurture your own heart

Don't Act Like

Don't act like you're there for me
When all you do is pretend
Don't act like it's all good
When you were never my friend

After all of the things we went through
I was always there, always true
So, don't tell me you're sorry
Just to get back in

I've moved on with my life
And I'm good to go
No more worries about offending
No more having to be just so

I was hurt in the beginning
But have come through the other side
Sleep has been really good
'Cause I never lied

Don't act like you're there for me
When all you do is pretend
Don't act like it's all good
When you were never my friend

All of the consoling
All of the late night talks
I know it was fake on your end
Do me a favor, kick rocks

I tried reaching out
But with no prevail
Now you're doing the same thing
But you can kiss my tail

Don't act like you're there for me
When all you do is pretend
Don't act like it's all good
When you were never my friend

So when times get rough again
Don't look for my support
I had your back at on time
But for some reason, it didn't work

No more walking on eggshells
Watching my words
All of your sad love stories
You can save for the birds

Don't act like you're there for me
When all you do is pretend
Don't act like it's all good
When you were never my friend

A Woman's Thoughts (I Didn't Know)

Things are so complicated right now! I really want to be with you, but I'm with someone who I don't love! It's really starting to become bothersome seeing you with HER cuddling up cozy by the fire. That should be me in your arms. Why did I let you go? What's wrong with me? The time apart wasn't going to be forever. You said, no...you promisd me you'd be back. I told you to go and do what you need to do and if things were meant to be, then they would. I didn't know that things were not going to be ME and YOU together. I didn't know that when you went away you'd come back with someone else. I didn't know that you could or would fall in love with someone else. I wish I were like
Superman and had the power to turn back time. Because if I could, then it would be me and you with our happily ever after. Instead, it's me looking from the outside in wishing and wanting to be with you. Hugging you felt like the right thing. It felt like old times. Like, WE were together again. Instead, it's her. Why do I have to feel like the other woman? Why do I have to step aside? Why do I have to bow down? Maybe if I just click my heels together three times...click, click, click! Nope! Nothing! She's still right next to you! I played the game of chess and you checked me. I'm sorry! I really messed up this time. Can we go back to when we were kids and play takesy, backsy? Give it to me straight. You don't love her. She's just a decoy, right? She's just the one you're with in the meantime. I know you really want me! Just say the word and I'm there. Come on now! I promise I'll say yes! I guess it's not gonna happen. Too much time has passed. I guess it's time for me to accept the inevitable. You love her now. I guess I'll have to wait until our next lifetime. Just know, I love you...

Let's Go Back

So, let's go back in the day when my love was like, Whoa! You know, back when Mya was the hottest new singer out?

Let's go back to when wearing acid washed jeans was the thing to do, and a girl tying her shirt at her hip was considered cute.

Let's go back to when having a rayon shirt of every color and style was considered FLY. (that cracks me up)

Let's go back to when banana clips and dolphin earrings were so in fashion that you were not hip enough if you didn't have either one.

Let's go back to when Jodeci was a hot ticket to get and Immature was teh opening act!

Let's go back to when girls thought it was cute to have three and four holes in one ear! (I never really understood that one)

Let's go back to when Miami Vice blazers with shoulder pads were the hottest trend.

Let's go back to when you had your first crush.

Let's go back to the first boy who pushed you, only to find out later on he was really digging you.

Let's go back to when times were simpler.

Seasons

Flowers bloom
Rain falls
Rainbows glow
My love for you grows stronger every day

Day comes
Night falls
Stars fall
The desire to have you with me is strong

Grass grows
Winds blow
Leave fall
I'm not ready for you to go on

Ice chills
Frost bites
Fires crackle
My heart will always be for you

Pacts

Sometimes, when you think you're doing the right thing for a friend, you end up doing the most hurtful thing. Recently, I have ended a friendship. It's a friendship I thought I'd have for a very long time considering my best friend is someone I have know since age 8. I normally don't let many people completely into my life, but this time I did.

I'm not going to go in to any detail about it because it's still too raw for me to talk about right now. Just know that when I accept someone as a friend of mine, I love them unconditionally. During most peoples friendships, there are pacts made like, when I make it into the NFL I'm going ot buy you a house or when I hit the lottery, I'll buy you a house. You know PACTS! When the friendship ends for whatever reason, the pact goes with it. Not with me! I see things a little differently than most. I believe when a promise, excuse me, I mean PACT is made, it should be honored to the best of your ability. What I'm trying to say is, there was a pact made during my friendship with someone. We said that if one of us makes, we would make sure to pass on the other ones names or bring them on board if possible. Since, that pact was made during our friendship, I feel it is something that should be fulfilled on my end.

I also understand that most people don't feel the same way I do, so I never expect it back. I just do it because it's what I want to do.

Now that my friendship has ended, I wish nothing but success for the individual. I will cherish the good times and focus on those instead of how or why our friendship ended. I know it seems very naive to most for me to focus on the good things instead of the bad, but why stress over something you can't control? At least, that's my philosophy!

Friendship is very hard to come by, so I tend to cherish the ones I have. Even the ones I no longer have.

In all of my rambling, I guess what I'm trying to say is, Keep taking care of yourself and your loved ones. Tomorrow is not promised, so try to make today a happy, joyful and fulfilling one. If you care about someone or something, be forth coming. Never regret what you could have, should have or would have done. There is a reason things happened the way the did!

Don't forget to tell those who mean something to you that you love them!!!

Love,

Jen Marie xoxo